The #freethenipple campaign has found numerous famous supporters. Miley Cyrus, Chrissy Teigen, Lena Dunham and many others have voiced their support in lifting the censorship regarding the exposure of female breasts. Supermodel Naomi Campbell was the latest celebrity to join that club and posted a topless picture on Instagram, which was taken down within 24 hours, due to their policy regarding nudity.

However, #freethenipple should represent so much more than the right to show bare breasts. It should spark a discussion about nudity in general and how it’s perceived in our culture.

The real question is: How did it happen that some cultures have labeled the sight of a naked body as something dirty?

Is it really so much worse to see a topless woman on a beach than someone wearing a bikini top that has merely the size of a stamp, barely covering the nipple area? I personally think the latter is a much naughtier tease.

Same goes for TV. It makes very little sense to look at two characters on a TV show who just had [simulated] sex in a scene and after they’re done, the woman gets up to go to the bathroom with a whole set of sheets wrapped around her. We all know that this never happens in real life. Therefore, showing nudity in such a situation would make sense. On the other hand, if nudity is used in a scene for no other reason than showing a naked body, it’s wouldn’t make any sense and wouldn’t be necessary. I think there is a time and place for everything; it’s the circumstances that matter and common sense.

In several African countries, such as Namibia and Ethiopia women and men are commonly topless, and no one makes a big deal out of it. In Europe, there are many beaches and public swimming pools with topless women and since it’s nothing out of the ordinary, you don’t see people staring at bare breasts any more than people would do, when they find someone attractive who is completely clothed. In European shower gel commercials, for instance, they show naked bodies and no one perceives it as something sexual or shocking, because it is only natural to be naked when you take a shower. Nudity only becomes a big deal when a society has labeled it a taboo.

We were born naked and there shouldn’t be anything wrong with the sight of a naked body. I’m not advocating to parade around naked for shock value, but we shouldn’t feel so offended if people choose not to wear clothes under appropriate circumstances.

In fact, we have become so paranoid that we feel it’s something immoral if our children see us naked. I’m not suggesting that people shouldn’t wear clothes at home but it gives children a very distorted view of life, if it’s such a shocker to see someone unclothed. I think it’s this very attitude that teaches a child that being naked is solely associated with sex, and it insinuates that there’s something wrong with our bodies. When little children examine themselves, there’s absolutely nothing wrong in their behavior. They look at their bodies as part of discovering life until we point out to them that they’re doing something inappropriate.

Any time something is considered a taboo, it only sparks more curiosity. Only if something is forbidden, it triggers the urge in some to use it to push buttons. Remember the scandal around Janet Jackson and her Superbowl performance, when her nipple got exposed? The sight of a plain nipple shouldn’t create such uproar. Ultimately, it’s still just part of the human body and a stunt like this can only draw so much attention because of our questionable point of view. I even dare to say that this “malfunction” wouldn’t have taken place under different circumstances. It’s a textbook example for using a taboo to stir up attention because it was very predictable that it would create the kind of outrage that it did.

If we would stop making nudity such a big deal, and just see it as part of life, we would have a society with a much healthier body image. People would have a better understanding of their issues (in regards to suppression, sexuality, self-acceptance as well as self-esteem) and we wouldn’t have so many people who are so self-conscious in regards to how they feel about their bodies.

#freethenipple, #freethemind

With Arnold Schwarzenegger recently in the news for commenting on how therapy has ruined his chance to patch things up with his estranged wife Maria Shriver, I wanted to take the opportunity to talk about therapy.

As with most things, there is an upside and a downside with therapy.

While therapy will definitely help to understand the underlying issues of a more complex matter, often it's also the cause to dwell on the feeling of being victimized. There are therapists who give action-oriented advice but some keep digging in the patients past in great detail to find more reasons as to why a person is the way she is. Therapy can definitely help to enlighten someone in terms of behavioral patterns but if it turns into an endless reasoning as to why we became the way we are and why it is so hard to change, then it's quite counterproductive.

Often, when therapists do the latter, it turns people into neurotic self-conscious individuals, and it makes them feel even more as a victim of circumstances.

When something bad of a more serious matter has happened to a person, she might definitely benefit from getting out all her emotions and fears of a particular situation (i.e. rape, violent abuse), but at some point, one has to move on. How does it serve the victim to never trust anyone again, to deny herself the beauty of physical pleasure? Not only does that make the abuser win all over again, ultimately it's a form of self-punishment for the victim.

This is just one example, where the wrong kind of therapy can keep a person in that mind-frame forever; that she is broken and incapable to move on.

There are many minor issues that lead people into that same kind of thinking. "...because when I was a child, my brother always stole my toys, therefore I have trust issues today." That's just one example to show how certain therapy methods create a form of codependency. In these kinds of cases the patient will come back for any little issue and stay in therapy for all the wrong reasons.

Some people end up believing they're so screwed up that they can never let go and move on with their lives. Then therapy become merely a crutch to hold on to, to dwell in pain, to never take responsibility for one's actions. In these cases people just find more and more reasons to blame the past for everything that goes wrong in the present. It makes them feel powerless and passive.

Most people didn't grow up in a perfect environment but that shouldn't mean that they can't create a new, much more positive life for themselves. If one just focuses on all the baggage they carry, they will never be happy, because their awareness is constantly focused on their pains and the past.

It is very important to learn from the past, but if all current and future events are always seen through the eyes of the past it becomes a vicious circle

There is definitely a place for therapy but in my point of view, it's only valuable if it leads to proactive positive changes.

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